Few things have inspired or pleased me more than the book I’m currently reading, Story of a Soul: The Autobiography of St. Therese of Lisieux (The Little Flower). I’ve yet to finish the book, but I’ve decided to write this short reflection on one of its passages, hoping that others might feel a bit of the inspiration I’ve felt learning and reading about the life of The Little Flower.
I don’t quite remember how I came to know about St. Therese of Lisieux. My best guess is that I first heard of her while listening to a sermon or podcast featuring someone who mentioned her “Little Way”. But I do recall why I became interested in learning more about her life:
There’s a song by Porter’s Gate entitled “Little Things with Great Love.” It’s a beautiful song, written by Audrey Assad and sung by Madison Cunningham, which is inspired by The Little Flower’s life. The song’s lyrics, with their unusual, haunting melody, are accompanied by guitar and violins. Often using the analogy of a garden, as does St. Therese herself, the song speaks of how precious each person and each loving act are in the sight of God. I discovered the song quite some time after it was released but it has had a great impact on me, both musically and spiritually. It was this song that eventually led me to begin reading St. Therese’s autobiography.
The passage, or rather the image, from Story of a Soul that has so far struck me most is the one St. Therese paints of herself with the Child Jesus, as she expresses her deep longing to surrender herself to whatever this Child desires of her. Just before expressing this longing, St. Therese recounts the story of entering the presence of Pope Leo XIII and, though forbidden to speak, asking him to allow her to become a member of the Carmel order of nuns at the age of fifteen, a year before she officially would be eligible. After some clarification of the situation, the Pope responds that she must do what the Superiors decide and that she will enter if it is God’s Will.
After describing her tears at this incident and reflecting on the faithfulness of God in the end, she writes:
Sometime before this took place I had offered myself to the Child Jesus to be His little plaything. I told Him not to treat me like one of those precious toys which children only look at and dare not touch, but to treat me like a little ball of no value, that could be thrown on the ground, kicked about, pierced, left in a corner, or pressed to His Heart just as it might please Him. In a word I wished to amuse the Holy child and to let Him play with me as He fancied. Here indeed He was answering my prayer. In Rome Jesus pierced His little plaything. He wanted to see what was inside . . . and when satisfied, He let it drop and went to sleep. What Was He doing during His sweet slumber, and what became of the ball thus cast on one side? He dreamed that He was still at play, that He took it up or threw it down, that He rolled it far away, but at last He pressed it to His Heart, nor did He allow it again to slip from His tiny Hand.
The image of so surrendering herself to the Child Jesus that she would be content to be his “little plaything”, to be “kicked about”, and to even be pierced, as it were, by a pin or some other sharp object, as very young boys are wont to do to their most loved and used toys to see what they might be made of; the image of abandoning herself that she might be enjoyed by Jesus and occasionally pressed to his Heart as his own special possession for which he is jealous—this is a picture of true and beautiful surrender to the will of God.
Oh, that we all could have such trust in the Lord and commit ourselves to his will, whatever may come, having confidence that in short time, He will draw us back to His heart and remind us of His deep love and affection for us. Moreover, that we would have the sincere desire to please Him above all else. What saints we would be and what virtue we would display if we all had such hearts.
Through her words, St. Therese has helped me see that I ought to desire the Lord on His terms, not on my own, trusting in His goodness and in his desire that I might be made holy through His divine instruction and cooperation with His grace.
I invite you to read Story of a Soul so that you can be encouraged and blessed, as I have been, by the life of this most beloved saint.